I wish so much that my real name was Stella! It sounds slightly old fashioned and I loveee that!!
I have had a few interesting messages on Collarspace today. The first one was from a Dom obsessed with extreme anal torture. I mean, EXTREME. Supposedly, he likes to use baseball bats and traffic cones in the same way that one would use a butt plug. Not only that, he likes to use these things at the same time. Is that even possible!? I’m guessing it’s a big exaggeration, but ouch! No thanks.
I get a lot of what I deem ‘unrealistic expectations’ shoved into my inbox. An example is the above, but also those who think they can actually keep a person locked in a cage in their basement for the rest of their lives.
The second was from a Master (he said anyone who identified as a Dom was fake) who was looking for a bi-sexual, no limits slave. In other words, a unicorn. I did not even reply to his message as he went on to say that submissives were also fake because they should be a no limits slave or just stay vanilla.
I very much dislike when someone calls someone fake for having a different opinion. My favorite thing about the BDSM and kink world is that you can basically mold it however you want. As long as you are being safe, sane, and consensual, there is no right or wrong way to live the lifestyle.
I have been called a fake for many reasons: being a sub and not a slave, not being into other women, having limits, not liking a certain fetish, not being a doormat, etc, etc, etc.. For awhile, it really bothered me and contributed to my second thoughts about my submissiveness. Now I just giggle at those people. Call me fake if you want. The real lesson here is: be happy and live your life in whatever way you want!
On an unrelated note, I took a personality test today. I am, apparently, an INFP. Basically, an idealist or a dreamer. I felt really misunderstood for a minute as I did not feel that idealist fit me and then the first paragraph of the description said “most likely to feel misunderstood.” Hit the nail on the head with that one.