Separate identities

It’s been a few days since my last post!  It was the end of the fiscal quarter this week at work so I was busy crunching away on numbers.

I have realized that I have not given an update on my sexting adventure I spoke about a month ago.  The profile was created and everything was approved however I was unable to figure out how to show myself as ‘available’ and customer service was not helpful.  In typical Stella fashion, I got frustrated and basically just said ‘fuck it’.  I may revisit it in the future.  I tend to believe that all things happen for a reason, it just was not meant to be.

Lately I have been having a lot of ‘realizations’ about my life.  One of them is that I have been separating my “regular” self from my submissive self.  Hence, the constant internal struggle.  I can trace it back to the beginning.  After the Jason fiasco, instead of giving him his fair share of blame, I blamed my hurt entirely on my submissive side.  Thus, I separated my life into the two different categories.

I don’t know how to fix it, or if it even needs to be fixed.  But perhaps it’s the key because I really do want to be able to reach my submissive self again.






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