This week has been far better than my previous weeks. Most notably, I do not burst into random tears at random times throughout the day and night. I am almost back to my usual smitten kitten, daydreamy, heart-eyed self.
Running away was not my best idea. Not even in the realm of a good idea, BUT I learned some things:
- I am a submissive and it does not matter whether you or anyone else agrees with me. I know I am, and that’s that. On that same note, I must stop comparing myself to other submissives.
- I did not confuse lust and love. I missed Sir more during that week than I have ever missed anyone or anything in my entire life, so much so that it was physically painful. (You know, like… it burns, burns, burns… the ring of fire) That is not lust.
- I need to trust. Sir has beyond proven that he deserves that trust. All of the times he could have given up on me and he did not.
I think I have been trying harder lately – to be a better submissive and a better person in general. I did not just wake up one day and decide to be submissive, I have known since I was a teenager. Running away and giving up seemed like the easiest option at the time and it absolutely was not. Not at all.