Thought I would sit down and type out a few more answers to the 30 Days of Kink questions, as I mentioned in my last post I was getting a little sick of them so I bunched a few together to get through them faster.
I am not feeling mentally well this afternoon, unfortunately so I’m hoping these answers are sufficient.
You can find these prompts here.
Day 11: What are your views on the ethics of kink?
I believe as long as you’re being safe and everything is consensual, then its all good. Being into BDSM and kink do not make someone unethical, being a shitty person does and they come in all varieties.
Day 12: Tell us about a humorous BDSM/kink experience you’ve had. If you haven’t had one, talk about aspects of kink/BDSM you find funny.
I do not recall any specific humorous experiences I have had, but my favorites moments are the ones where humor can easily be injected. I cannot stand scenes that are overly serious. Sex is supposed to be fun, high protocol situations make me anxious and cause me to withdraw.
Day 13: Explain as best you can what the appeal of kink/BDSM is to you? Why are you drawn to what you’re drawn to?
I am drawn to the power exchange simply because I love feeling powerless. I don’t think further explanation is needed.
Day 14: How would you say real life BDSM/kink varies from fantasy BDSM/kink? If you haven’t experienced real life BDSM/kink, how do you think it might differ?
In my world, fantasies tend to be pretty unrealistic and everything always goes smoothly. That is definitely not the case in real life.
Day 15: Post a BDSM/kink activity you’re curious about and would like to try?
Sensory deprivation. Maybe.
Day 16: What are the most difficult aspects of having a sexuality that involves kink or BDSM for you personally?
The most difficult aspect for me is trying to remind myself that there is nothing wrong with me.
Day 17: What misconception about kinky people would you most like to clear up?
That submissive women are setting feminism back a million years. I am submissive and a feminist. It is my choice to make. It seems like the stereotypical submissive is typecast as unintelligent and weak.
Day 18: Any kinky/BDSM pet peeves? If so, what?
When people try to include oblivious strangers into their kink – example, I worked at Lane Bryant for two years while in college and we had SO many men calling in to ask inappropriate questions about panties and bras while they were clearly masturbating on the other end. I had a few ask point-black what kind of panties I wore and whether I ever masturbated. Obviously, we always hung up on those callers but we did not consent to being asked sexual questions and it made us feel disgusting and violated.
Sometimes I read blog posts about people doing things in front of strangers or asking them questions on purpose to get their sexual rocks off. Maybe I’m in the minority, but I find that strange and because I have had that done to me before and can easily recognize it, it would make me extremely uncomfortable.
Doms that think all submissives must submit to them solely based on their status as a Dominant. NOPE. Also, Doms that have absolutely insane fantasies about locking women up in their basements and never letting them leave or see their family/friends/etc. This door swings both ways though, believe it isn’t just Doms.
Anyone that shames another person for their preferred kinks or for not enjoying a certain kink. I have taken SO much shit, as in told I am not a real submissive, for not being poly. That gets old fast. As I said under the first question, as long as you’re being safe and everything is consensual, it’s all good. However, not everyone is obligated to enjoy your kink.
Day 19: Any unexpected ways kink has improved your life? Is so, what are they?
Let me list a few:
I started this blog.
I met lots of interesting people.
I met Sir.
I have been learning to accept myself.
Day 20: Talk about something within kink/bdsm that you’re curious about or don’t understand.
There is a lot I don’t understand, but I won’t go into here because too many people get offended when you tell them you don’t understand something they enjoy, even when you’re truly just trying to get a better understanding.