What Does Submission Mean To You?

Does a submissive have certain behaviors? Do submissives do specific tasks?

No behaviors/tasks are set by the Dom. Some subs share certain traits; quietness, being reserved, overly apologizing, or avoiding eye contact. This is not an exhaustive list nor is it true of all subs. Stella for example kicks ass and takes names at work, literally doing the jobs of three people, yet she is also quiet and reserved. No two people are alike, so they will never have the same behaviors, and subs are people too. ūüėČ When it comes to tasks again no two Doms are alike and no two will want things done the same way.

Here is where I think the sub questions are off point, because subs are a diverse group. The 6’4″ guy I would not want to face in a fight can be, and some of them are, as sub as a petite 5 foot tall blonde. While not all subs share a shape/size/manner/gender, they do share one thing, a mind set. Subs want to please, they want to be of service and making their partner happy makes them happy. The degree to which they are willing to sacrifice their own happiness to me marks the difference between a sub and a slave.

When you think of a submissive and submission, what thoughts come to mind?

Service, strength, vulnerability, love, desire.

What does submission mean to you?

The next writing prompt in the 30 Days of D/s is about submission and what it means. Considering that I am indeed a submissive, I hope this will be easy… but, I’m willing to bet it won’t be. ūüėČ

As I mentioned previously, Sir will also be answering this prompt, and all the others, so keep an eye out for that!  You can see previous answers from both myself and Sir, here.

Does a submissive have certain behaviors?  Do submissives do specific tasks? When you think of a submissive and submission, what thoughts come to mind?

So, does a submissive have certain behaviors?  Yes and for the most part, they probably are similar across the board.  Obviously, there will be variances as we were not all created by the same cookie cutter.  I will list a few behaviors of mine that I consider to be submissive behaviors, some obvious and some maybe not so much.  This is absolutely not an exhaustive list and you may not agree.

  1. I am obedient to Sir’s wishes. ¬†This does not mean I am a doormat.
  2. I try my best to be open minded/flexible when it comes to things that might make me a little uncomfortable, but are not necessarily hard limits.
  3. Sir is on my mind 99.9% of the time but I do not let it interfere in my career, friendships, etc..   That said, he is my priority.  Balance is the key.
  4. I am open with him about my likes/dislikes, fears, goals, feelings and anything else you can imagine.
  5. I work to understand that needs/wants are two extremely different things.  I put our needs at equal importance, but I will always put his wants before mine.

The re-occurring theme here is that submissive does not equal weak. ¬†Submission, in my opinion, shows extreme strength. ¬†It isn’t easy to submit to another and give them that kind of power over you. ¬†It certainly is not for everyone. ¬†I crave and need it more than almost anything, but it is still a struggle to give up control sometimes.

While many submissive behaviors might be similar from one submissive to another, their tasks may not be.  I cannot say that submissives have specific tasks.  I only say this because I assume their tasks are set by their Dom and I cannot imagine each and every Dom wants the same thing.

I don’t have a ton but here are is an example or two of tasks from my D/s relationship: ¬†I edge every single day and sometimes more often per Sir’s request. ¬†On the occasion that I am allowed to orgasm, I always record it (we are long distance at the moment, if you did not know.).

When I think of submissives and submission, I think of the following things: freedom (yes, really. ¬†Perhaps I can expand on this later.), trust, deep connections, kink & sex, love, obedience, communication, learning, discipline, rules, strength…. ¬†The list goes on and on.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this same prompt – feel free to leave it in the comments!

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