What does submission mean to you?

The next writing prompt in the 30 Days of D/s is about submission and what it means. Considering that I am indeed a submissive, I hope this will be easy… but, I’m willing to bet it won’t be. ūüėČ

As I mentioned previously, Sir will also be answering this prompt, and all the others, so keep an eye out for that!  You can see previous answers from both myself and Sir, here.

Does a submissive have certain behaviors?  Do submissives do specific tasks? When you think of a submissive and submission, what thoughts come to mind?

So, does a submissive have certain behaviors?  Yes and for the most part, they probably are similar across the board.  Obviously, there will be variances as we were not all created by the same cookie cutter.  I will list a few behaviors of mine that I consider to be submissive behaviors, some obvious and some maybe not so much.  This is absolutely not an exhaustive list and you may not agree.

  1. I am obedient to Sir’s wishes. ¬†This does not mean I am a doormat.
  2. I try my best to be open minded/flexible when it comes to things that might make me a little uncomfortable, but are not necessarily hard limits.
  3. Sir is on my mind 99.9% of the time but I do not let it interfere in my career, friendships, etc..   That said, he is my priority.  Balance is the key.
  4. I am open with him about my likes/dislikes, fears, goals, feelings and anything else you can imagine.
  5. I work to understand that needs/wants are two extremely different things.  I put our needs at equal importance, but I will always put his wants before mine.

The re-occurring theme here is that submissive does not equal weak. ¬†Submission, in my opinion, shows extreme strength. ¬†It isn’t easy to submit to another and give them that kind of power over you. ¬†It certainly is not for everyone. ¬†I crave and need it more than almost anything, but it is still a struggle to give up control sometimes.

While many submissive behaviors might be similar from one submissive to another, their tasks may not be.  I cannot say that submissives have specific tasks.  I only say this because I assume their tasks are set by their Dom and I cannot imagine each and every Dom wants the same thing.

I don’t have a ton but here are is an example or two of tasks from my D/s relationship: ¬†I edge every single day and sometimes more often per Sir’s request. ¬†On the occasion that I am allowed to orgasm, I always record it (we are long distance at the moment, if you did not know.).

When I think of submissives and submission, I think of the following things: freedom (yes, really. ¬†Perhaps I can expand on this later.), trust, deep connections, kink & sex, love, obedience, communication, learning, discipline, rules, strength…. ¬†The list goes on and on.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this same prompt – feel free to leave it in the comments!

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So many feelings

I have been feeling so overwhelmed lately.¬† Life has been a lot to handle over the recent weeks.¬† It isn’t good or bad, it just is.¬† I feel like I’m on the edge of something amazing though.

I have also been struggling with my place in this lifestyle.¬† I know I am submissive, but how submissive I am remains to be seen.¬† I think for the right person (for Sir!) it could run rather deeply.¬† I also still struggle with the stereotype that society pushes on submissive women.¬† I found the below quote and, for me, it’s so true.¬† I willingly submit to ONE man but I am no doormat.

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Those smitten kitten feelings I wrote about the other day have NOT worn away.¬† Sir is always on my mind and I get turned on just thinking about him, a fantastic daydream.¬† I like that he isn’t turned off by my clinginess, my need for attention. I could go on and on….

Sir has set quite a few rules now.¬† Well, in my opinion at least… I haven’t EVER had rules in my entire life.¬† But, that’s what I want.¬† Those rules are helping me toward my own goals and I don’t feel resentful towards him like I worried I might.¬† Not even when I ‘forget’ a rule and end up writing lines. LOL.¬† For the first time, in a LONG time, it felt like someone actually cared.

The only problem so far is that I want to be closer to him.¬† My attachment is growing quickly and it feels right… but at some point, I’m going to want to feel him physically touch me (and inside me, for that matter! LOL).

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